War! War! War!———–War!

Today my dearies I have attained enlightenment. I am blissfully one with the world. The reason for my current state is a cooking show I saw in the morning. They made oats with orange, it’s zest, raw cocoa beans, honey, chocolate bark and some more goodies; yum, yum , yum…( salivating)

***
“I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.”

-The folks over at goodreads say this was by Albert Einstein. I’ll confirm this with him later. My Ouija board is a bit dusty.

***
Yes; this is a story not an essay.

Ever since the day the miracle of opposable thumbs was bestowed upon our hairy hominid predecessor, they found full use of the grip thus developed to hurl stones at competing mates. Later as humanity entered its infancy, tools and arrow heads were chiseled out of those stones and again hurled at enemy tribes.

You know the rest; swords and rifles, press a button and boom goes the missile; just war, war, war. We have always loved guts and blood.

Nuclear weapons were in vogue in the recent past. The concept was basically to hoard as many nukes as possible and when the time is right just detonate them on the same planet both the fighting parties live on. To emphasise the point, I have made an awesome sketch below (took me hours.)

img_20161006_141824-02-01

But realizing and accepting the idiocy of our methods took great courage. This is the future. We have ditched those obsolete technologies and found a better way to fight, with full use of thumbs of course.

‘Welcome to World War III,’ the handsome young guy with mike announced.

“Oh, just give me my mike back,” the host shouted snatching it and kicking the guy off the stage.

“Welcome to World War III. Respected Presidents please follow your guides and proceed to the Combat Room and no don’t; President Mambi please, no more eye poking.”

The herd of black and white penguin suited presidents with their bodyguards followed the pretty girls beaconing them forward to enter the aforementioned Combat Room where another announcer greeted them.

“Welcome angry world leaders. For the past few months you have all wanted to rip each other’s throats apart. But the great thinker Confabler pointed out the errors in your ways and proposed a method to resolve conflicts with no violence. Generations to come will remember this historical moment and thank her for it. No more unnecessary deaths. Let the population grow happily in peace until we exhaust our resources and migrate to Mars. Everyone please be seated.”

All the Madam and Mr. Presidents then planted their butt cheeks on the soft plushy cushions of the couches in their respective flag’s colors.

“This is a Real Time Strategy video gaming war. The rules are:

1. You have all been given six months time with beginners’ instructions to develop your army and base.

2. Fight each other’s armies online and conquer their base.

3. A country is victorious only if the fluorescent green victory flag is hosted on the enemy’s headquarters.

4. The result announced by the mediator is final and non-negotiable. Don’t try to kill him if the outcome is not in your favor.

5. A peace treaty will be signed for the next hundred years between the conflicting nations after the results.

6. You may form alliances with each other in the game and multiple parties of winning alliances may win.

7. Only the presidents themselves will compete against each other; representing their countries. Opponents will be chosen on the basis of which countries they hate the most.

8. Bodyguards or anyone else will not help the presidents in any manner.

9. Chips and coke are provided to each and every nation in equal amount and of the same quality. Don’t fight over them. We have a bunker full of them.

10. Check your bladders. No bathroom breaks once the games start.

11. You may fight with as many nations as you wish. Go crazy.

12. Last thing: the game can’t be hacked. Please tell your hackers to stop trying to break into our system otherwise you will lose by default.

If you have any doubts or trouble please contact our seventeen year old technical advisers.

May the Gods bless your thumbs.

Welcome to the future. Welcome to World War III 2017.”

***
Day 3 of 3 day quotes challenge as nominated by fauxcroft. Thank you for the nomination and don’t forget to visit his/her place if you haven’t already.

Mr. Einstein left a lot of room for imagination.

If you like my idea, then please raise your voice so that we may fight our wars without real bloodshed. This will promote the development of artificial intelligence to improve our gaming experience. The machines will one day take over and start killing humans. Then we will move to Mars.

yoda-1091030_1280

Pic credits: pixabay

30 thoughts on “War! War! War!———–War!

  1. Abdullah Syed says:

    Sorry. I was engaged with an urgent piece of work. You have brought the crux out of everything that needs to be understood by many of our young ones. Which I don’t think so they will be able to understand. I totally agree that the upcoming generation is full of ignorance, Im sorry to use that word but the very generation is the dumbest of all. Somewhere in the corner, technology has to be blamed and free exercise of disgraceful social norms that has been originating in a certain area of the world and has been influencing others too. Which leaves them no where but confused, not knowing their history, evolution and the way of advancement. No doubt, they are much politically aware but at the same time they have been fighting for self-righteousness. Generalising and idealising people that bring up a total distorted opinion is also one of the reason of this catastrophic aftermath of humans.

    Yes, I totally agree that science is a experimental analysis of science. Because everything that happens around us has a legit reason. Be it the growth of a tree or a big bang theory. Everything has a logic. But according to my opinion, it can be wrong. There is someone behind all the happenings. The ratio of existance of earth (as I mentioned before), the meaning of life and existence of human on the very planet. Such questions really deny the uncertainty that many people believe in.

    Its also right that firm belief on religion refrains free exercise of thinking. Thought beyond the boundaries of research. No religion refrains the concept of science. It’s just that, in the modern age the interpretation of religion has gone all wrong. Be it Islam, christianity or any other religion in the world. Some so called clerics have taken over the concept of religion which brings nothing but hatred which could be intra or inter religious beliefs. No religion in he world defies technological advancement and its use. It’s just that people have been derailed, they were destined to take some other path but how unfortunate they took some other. This unfortunate happening cannot be described by science. Science could answer how people were brainwashed to do so. But Why it happened. It may have some worldly reasons referring international politics but it had to happen. This world is going to be more dangerous than ever. Because everything that has taken place has an end, be it human, this universe or any happening. Buddhists doing genocide in Myanmar promotes that buddhism is violent? certainly not. Islamic terrorism promotes violence? certainly not? Does white supremacists represent christianity as violent religion? people are violent on their end and they need to be dealt with strict hands regardless their colour caste and creed. Sadly, I don’t see that happening.

    Furthermore, I’m going to read this and come up with an observation. Cheers!

    Liked by 1 person

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